Changes
How do you tend to react or respond when someone changes their mind? It could be something as simple as parking your car to go to supper and the person you rode there with suddenly says, “I don’t want to eat here anymore, can we go somewhere else?” Or it could be something as complex as, “I don’t want this relationship anymore.” Regardless of what change or decision by others is dropped in our lap, these decisions that other people make around us are not our fault, nor do they define us in any way. They definitely still affect us and how our future looks short term, or long term. Enter grief. I know I tend to talk about it often, but again, whenever a change of any kind occurs around us, it's the grief we experience. We feel big feelings and process them to understand what has happened, but also how we move forward with our own lives. We grieve what was and what will be now.
When people tell us things, we tend to believe what they say, unless there’s a reason to believe otherwise. It’s the challenge of trusting others, but also trusting ourselves when change does happen and people change their minds. We are all free to change our minds at any time. Yes, we will more than likely navigate some guilty feelings and some grief, but we also all have agency and autonomy over our own lives. We only get this one life, and we deserve to live it as authentic and honest as possible. We never know when our last day will be on this planet, and I really do believe that we all need to do what is best for us as quickly as we discover we need or want a change.
There is a quote by Gladys McGarey that she shares in one of my favorite books, A Life Well Lived, that says “Once you know better, everything else becomes a choice.” I personally believe in continued self development and working on a clear, positive mindset daily. If we are present and aware of our life and mind, I believe we are able to recognize when we may be taking the backseat to our life and “coasting” through our life instead of intentionally living it. I don’t know about you, but I love when life feels fun, full, and free. I want to feel a beautiful flow in my entire life; a blend of personal and business life that makes me feel empowered and supported. I also like to make changes when things aren’t feeling good or are feeling forced. I notice my body giving me signs like tightness in my chest and getting exhausted easily when I’m forcing something that no longer feels good, or in alignment with what is good for me and my life, and I have to respect others when they have a similar realization for themselves and their lives.
Letting go and moving on is a process. It doesn’t happen overnight. If we are focusing on how to feel and heal all of our feelings though, I believe that we can process our feelings quicker when we practice it, and life gets easier and more carefree when we understand that change is the only constant in this life we live. So this spring, as the grass gets greener and the flowers start to blossom all around me, I’m going to remember that we all deserve to bloom and grow in our own ways, and that might change tomorrow, AND that’s ok. When we choose to live a more authentic life, I believe we can show and encourage people around us to do the same. Here’s to growing, learning, and being the best versions of ourselves we can be, through all the pivots and changes. We all deserve to live a joyful and loving life, every day. Keep being you for you, and watch everything else fall into place the way it’s intended to be.